You may have seen a picture in the last post from the March of Dimes event that was a blurry image of some typed words. If you worked extra hard, you may have even been able to make out those words. Even though those words were mine, the story was ours, they appeared the same to me the moment I saw them…distant and blurry. It is not that I was having a visual problem or, perhaps, started the wine a little early, it is just hard to believe, sometimes, that it all really happened.
It feels so long ago that “everything happened.” I often say it was a lifetime ago, but that is surely an understatement. If I remember correctly, I wrote those words as the intro to our CaringBridge site that we used to keep friends and family updated for the first year. It is so strange to even imagine being in that place at that time.
Flash forward to today…we are so blessed with our amazing fighter. We have incredible plans and opportunities on the horizon and we have incredible new people in our lives. But, for today, here’s to the memories…
Almost a year ago, my husband, Bryan, and I set off on a trip from our home in Northern California to my hometown of Bloomington, IL. We were expecting twin boys and my family friends were throwing us my first baby shower. However, 2 days before the shower, 2200 miles from home, I started experiencing some concerning symptoms and went to the hospital to get things checked out. The doctors found that I was 90% effaced and 1cm dilated. I was put in a helicopter and flown to the nearest hospital with a NICU.
Because my babies had not yet reached viability (24 weeks) I was given very bleak expectations. The amazing doctors at St Francis in Peoria, IL gave me medicine to delay labor and put me into Trendelenburg position (lower half higher than upper half) and there I stayed praying that my boys would stay safe inside as long as possible.
It worked, I was stable. My husband flew home because he had to return to work and we planned to have him visit every few weekends until the boys were born. However, the evening of August 3rd, I started having contractions and they couldn’t be stopped. I called Bryan at 3am and told him he needed to get back to Illinois as quickly as possible.
On August 4th, at 7:52am, Logan Robert was born at 23 weeks 4 days gestation. He was only 1lb 3oz but he survived. The doctor was able to keep our other baby, then known as Mac, of Mac and Cheese, in my womb where we prayed he would stay. I went back into Trendelenburg and Cheese went to the NICU (don’t worry, we officially named him Logan once Bryan arrived that evening).
The next 48 hours were a whirlwind. Bryan made laps between the NICU and L&D units bringing updates on our sweet miracle day and night. He never actually slept. One of our nurses finally gave him scrubs since he didn’t have clean clothes and even brought him Tshirts as our stay grew longer and he hadn’t had a chance to pack appropriately.
Again things seemed stable…
The evening of August 5th, I started having contractions again. My body couldn’t hold Mac in any longer. At 12:26am on August 6th, Jacob Bryan was born at 1lb 13oz, 23 weeks 6days gestation.
With both boys now in the NICU, we began life in a world we had never really known existed. A world where things aren’t really one day at a time, but one hour or one minute at a time. A world where they say “don’t get too high on the highs or too low on the lows” and “it’s a marathon, not a sprint.” A world where miracles happen every day and God’s grace is everywhere.